An old friend

Today I discovered an old friend. I struggled with the Lord for months trying to discern where I should go, what my next step should be. What's funny is that for no less than three years He has been telling me the same thing.

So why should I fight the Lord? Why is it so hard to simply say yes?

I think it is because for human beings, it is extremely difficult to die to the self. Sometimes, we lie to ourselves and try to convince ourselves that we are 'doing' something in the name of Christ.

"Oh Lord, I am doing this in your name, please bless my path."

"Oh Lord Jesus, I pray that you bless this move so that I may bless others."

Sometimes something may seem nice, even charitable. Heck, it may even be a good thing. But that doesn't mean that your heart is in the right place. The only time your heart is in the right place is when your heart is doing what God tells it to do. In other words, if your heart is obedient to the will of God, why then, your heart is in the right place, and the Lord will bless whatever it is you plan to do.

Yup. So even if you proclaim that you want to go on world missions, the Lord is not going to bless it if he tells you to go to the hospital next door and take up volunteer work there and pray over people. Yup. I mean it.

It seems incredulous. The Lord wants to bless whatever we do. He wants to proclaim his grace and provide for us. But he also sees into our hearts and knows everything we are thinking. And sometimes, whether we realize it or not, our motives may not be what they seem. Sometimes we think we are doing something magnanimous, but it is not in our best interests to do what we think is so great.

So back to my old friend. I had this idea for a praise and worship site for eons. The Lord was jumping for joy over it. Praise and worship, such a beautiful thing. The Lord loves it when we worship him. Oh, how much he loves it when we worship Him. And oh how I delight in worship. But I can't tell you how many times I would argue with the Lord.

Some ridiculous nonsense, like, "Lord, how am I going to support my family simply praising and worshiping you?"

Or, "Lord, you know I can't do that I have no stretch of talent in that area you are out of your mind!"

But you know what? I have come to realize that whatever the heck the Lord tells you to do you just better do it. Let the Holy Spirit figure the rest out. Sometimes one thing is simply a stepping stone to another. When you are obedient in small things, larger things will come. I typically roll my eyes at small things like this, but it is true. It is so true.

If the Lord tells you to pick up a pencil off the sidewalk, well then do it. Just do it.